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Phil's Latest Articles about Couples and Relationships

Philip Lewis In the News

BEVERLY HILLS RELATIONSHIP THERAPIST

Elon Musk, Ashley St. Clair and what her tell-all posts really mean.

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, May 24, 2026​​​​​​

Britney Spears arrest, concerned fans and why what we say matters.

By Sara Moniuszko and Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, Mar. 5, 2026​​​​​​

Rob Reiner's death, his son and when tragedy, addiction tear families apart.

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, Dec. 16, 2025​​​​​​

Bryan Khoberger has pleaded guilty. Will that finally bring closure?

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, July 3, 2025

A Connecticut stepmom, an emaciated 32-year-old and why her arrest shocked the community.

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, March 18, 2025

An OnlyFans model's viral documentary and why it sparked a major conversation about sex.

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, Dec. 19, 2024

People are obsessing over the man charged with murdering UnitedHealthcare CEO. How did we get here?

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, Dec. 10, 2024

Britney Spears' posts have some fans concerned. There's a right way to talk about it.

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, Dec. 4, 2024

Demi Lovato doesn’t remember much of her time on Disney Channel. It's called dissociation.

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, Sept. 2024

Polyamory seems more common among gay people than straight people. What’s going on?

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, June 2024

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Keeping it Together: Are gay people throwing out monogamy?

By Charles Trepany, USA TODAY, June 2024 

Glossary of Dating Red Flags

Are you one of the thousands of innocent individuals struggling to figure out why certain people in your life are always so difficult? ​If so, you're definitely not alone! Below is an unofficial, non-exhaustive glossary some common terms and phrases used to describe relationship red flags, dating red flags, narcissist red flags, and other toxic trends in dating and relationships.

Being Right

Couples try to resolve conflict by proving who’s right and who’s wrong. It feels logical to think you can end fights by establishing what really happened. But this is a Losing Strategy as it turns healthy repair attempts into battles over who got the facts wrong. “You can be right … or married.” — Terry Real

Blame-Shifting

A partner shifts responsibility for his own mistakes and misadventures onto you in order to absolve himself. Sometimes associated with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders.

Boundaries

In short, failure to respect healthy boundaries suggests a partner holds unhealthy views of themself, you and/or the relationship. According to Mark Manson, author of "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F@ck", each person In a couple must be able to accept responsibility for their contribution to the functioning of the relationship.

Phil's List of Must-Read Books for Cultivating Relational Joy

Us

Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship

By

Terrence Real

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F#ck

A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

By

Mark Manson

ADHD is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving With ADHD

A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD

By

Penn and Kim Holderness

ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life

Strategies that Work from an Acclaimed Professional Organizer and a Renowned ADD Clinician

By

Judith Kolberg & Kathleen Nadeau, PH.D.

I Hear You

The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships

By

Michael S. Sorensen

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