Relational Tools | Relationship Therapist Philip Lewis

Phil's Latest Articles about Couples and Relationships

Relationship Therapy Just Might Save Your Life

Throughout history, humans have tirelessly searched for the ultimate secret to eternal youth. We’ve tried every imaginable powder, lotion, process, and potion—hot saunas, cold plunges, hot and cold yoga, even blood transfusions, and “vampire” facials. None has meaningfully delayed the aging process. That is, until now. The key to living longer isn’t just whether or not you smoke, eat too much, get drunk on weekends, go to Pilates every day, or skip the gym entirely. Don’t get

Dating and Relationships

“Should I Break Up Before or After the Holidays?” — A Marriage Therapist Chimes in on the Annual Relationship Question

5 Key Questions You Must Ask Before Calling it Quits Holidays can bring out both the best and the worst in romantic relationships. The weeks between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Eve can be especially challenging for couples. Shopping pressures, toxic family dynamics, and increased spending stress can exaggerate already-heated tensions between partners — like a neon sign pointing directly at the most vulnerable fault lines in the couple’s relational foundation. When the emoti

Mindset

Happy Couple Hugging Outdoors on Sunny Day

How to Rescue Your Relationship by Being “Wrong” | Couples Therapy Los Angeles

Learn how couples therapy Los Angeles helps partners stop fighting to be “right” and start reconnecting through empathy, teamwork, and trust.

Relationship Advice

Male High-Performing Professional Looking at Smartphone

How High Achievers Overcome Substance Abuse and Leverage Addiction Recovery to Supercharge Success

Learn how high-performing professionals in addiction recovery transform substance abuse setbacks into success and competitive advantage

Addiction Recovery

Unwrapping Hidden Truths: Do Your Partner's Holiday Gifts Reveal Red Flags in a Relationship?

Observing how your partner approaches gift-giving can provide valuable insight into the strength or weakness of your relationship.

Dating and Relationships

Is News Addiction (Literally) Killing You?

This article provides five simple strategies to help you avoid being overwhelmed by news addiction or social media addiction.

Mindset

Glossary of Dating Red Flags

Are you one of the thousands of innocent individuals struggling to figure out why certain people in your life are always so difficult? If so, you're definitely not alone! Below is an unofficial, non-exhaustive glossary some common terms and phrases used to describe relationship red flags, dating red flags, narcissist red flags, and other toxic trends in dating and relationships.

Being Right

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Couples try to resolve conflict by proving who’s right and who’s wrong. It feels logical to think you can end fights by establishing what really happened. But this is a Losing Strategy as it turns healthy repair attempts into battles over who got the facts wrong. “You can be right … or married.” — Terry Real

Blame-Shifting

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A partner shifts responsibility for his own mistakes and misadventures onto you in order to absolve himself. Sometimes associated with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders.

Boundaries

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In short, failure to respect healthy boundaries suggests a partner holds unhealthy views of themself, you and/or the relationship. According to Mark Manson, author of "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F@ck", each person In a couple must be able to accept responsibility for their contribution to the functioning of the relationship.